By Gerarda M. Culipher, Esq.[1]
Age of Majority or Age of Maturity?
Among the laws of Virginia, age matters. A young adult’s birthday can impact not only their rights and benefits, but also their duties, obligations and liabilities. For most provisions of Virginia law, eighteen years old marks the age of legal majority. This is why families with children who have severe disabilities, may choose to petition their local Circuit Court for Guardianship[2] over their special-needs kiddo six months prior to their 18th birthday party. Most folks know that the right to vote[3] is tied to this hallmark; many have heard that “being charged with a crime as an adult” tests the gravity of the allegation against the Defendant’s D.O.B.; and some even remember The Draft, and see it’s residuary in our young men registering with the Selective Service at eighteen.[4] But did you know that Virginia set the age-threshold for getting a Marriage License at 18 years only eight[5] years ago? Teen-brides now bump into a firm age-limit for Saying Yes to The Dress, in modern Virginia. While the age of majority is objective, the age of maturity is subjective.
Wisely, the law builds exceptions to 18, as a bright-line rule, where Virginia expands its concept of qualifying maturity. For example, there’s the 21-year age threshold for accessing adoption[6] records, Virginia’s Fostering Futures Program[7] supports foster kids who are cusping into adulthood up through their early 20s, and, of course, the legal age of twenty-one, for buying beer.[8]
In today’s complex, global, and litigious world, young adults face a bevy of rights and duties as they mature-out of their childhood, and into “adulting.” These days the launch of a young adult may be more methodical, than explosive. Comedian Bill Maher, with his ever-critical-eye, has an HBO Special titled “#adulting,” where he challenges modern America’s rearing of Millennials and Gen Z, as perhaps… too gentle. But if the public law indicates that an on-ramp to adulthood can make sense, how does private law effectuate this gradation?
Powers of Majority: To be Free From & To Rely On
For 18 years, parents enjoy a sort of private-sovereignty over their children; parental control is near-plenary. But at eighteen, children are legally autonomous. Think of this as an incredible milestone for parents: ‘Congratulations! You raised your kids so well, into such capable young adults, that your authorities are now only those powers that your child explicitly provides you! Cosign here.’
At 18, your kids are at once free of you, and free to enlist you.
As a practical matter, in the twilight between their childhood and complete independence, your kids may want some extra support from you, by granting parents Durable Power of Attorney[9] (DPOA). They can hire a lawyer[10] to create “Powers Documents” (Durable Power of Attorney, Advance Medical Directive, HIPAA Waiver and Final Disposition Instructions), and they should carefully review just how much intrusive-authority they are actually granting. Some DPOAs are operative immediately upon execution, and still others only spring into effect at some triggering event (severe sickness, incapacity, deployment with the military, or extended overseas absence like study abroad, mission work, or foreign service).
A Durable Power of Attorney is a legal document that details permissions and authorities which empower the Agent to not only sign on behalf of the Principal, but to access, alter, maintain and use financial accounts, personal property, and real property. When a young adult executes a DPOA in favor of their parent, it will feel familiar, since many of the legal rights and access rights that are drafted into a fulsome DPOA, cover areas the once-minor child had no command of. Being the legal guardian, the responsible billing contact, or being the signatory for legal permissions was the norm for the parent for almost two decades.
- Can the parent fight with a landlord for a termination of a lease the young adult signed?
- Will a school registrar or bursar permit a parent to view grades or payments?
- Can a parent deposit Grandma’s Gift Check into their bank account, for the young adult?
- Can the parent access their school or campus medical clinic files to see if they are having an allergic reaction while home for Thanksgiving?
- Can the parent file their tax return for them while they’re at school?
Of course the natural question to be asked is “Yes, you can, if the POA says so; but should you?” This is the larger question of emerging maturity, personal autonomy, and the feedback-loop of personal accountability. As laid-out above, even the State, as an echo of our community standards, sees adulthood as an on-ramp, with various age-thresholds, set in context.
Your Most Beloved Customer: The Legal Limits of a Parent-Agent
Still other “Powers” given by the Principal (in this case the Young Adult) to the “Agent” (the Parent) may feel unfamiliar; uncomfortable even. For instance, naming the Parent as the Personal Representative for End-of-Life affairs that notoriously indestructible youths rarely think about, can prompt some good, tough, existential, conversations at the Thanksgiving Table.
- Does the Young Adult want to donate their organs at, or after, death?
- Does the Young Adult want to be cremated?
- Does the Young Adult want a religious funeral?
- Does the Young Adult want to be buried in a particular place?
When we talk candidly about the procedures of death, we can’t help but reveal the great purpose of life.
Parents who agree to serve as the Agent, Attorney-in-Fact, or Personal Representative for an unmarried young adult child, should consider not just whether to support the Principal as his/her rep, but they also need to re-think, or re-orient, howthey will be assisting. Being a DPOA Agent is not the same as being the parent to a minor child, in the eyes of the law. The Parent-Agent cannot supplant their own, personal preferences, over the expressed desires of the young adult Principal. They cannot defy the reasonably-known wishes as to End of Life care, in violation of the explicit directions of the young adult Principal. They cannot object to the choices described in the young adult’s legal estate planning documents. While a Parent’s heart may break, her legal duty to the young adult Principal cannot falter. The Young Adult is now more of a precious and beloved client, than a child.
Conclusion
As Thanksgiving Break rolls around, and young adult children are returning home, this may be a good time for families to discuss the continuum of independence. While Parents may still be listing a young adult as a “dependent” for tax purposes, or may be generously offering medical insurance coverage to a 20-something child, the law of Virginia puts up legal barriers to full, intrusive, parental access to a young adult’s autonomy. This is a good thing. And it is an overcome-able thing. The legal mechanism is for a fully-informed, adult child to consider, weigh and then grant to their parents, only those permissions and authorities they are comfortable sharing, through a Durable Power of Attorney, Advance Medical Directive and other “Powers” documents.
To learn more about Durable Power of Attorney, Advance Directive, HIPAA Waivers, and Final Disposition Instructions, feel free to call us at 703-865-2525. Or find us on-line at www.DominionLawGroup.net, for more information.
[1] Gerarda M. Culipher, Esq. is a member of the Virginia and DC bars. Image photo credit: edevalterna blogspot, i.pinimg.com
[2] § 64.2-2001. Filing of petition; jurisdiction; instructions to be provided (virginia.gov)
[3] § 24.2-403. Persons under 18 years of age (virginia.gov)
[4] Benefits & Penalties | Selective Service System : Selective Service System (sss.gov)
[5] § 20-48. Minimum age of marriage (virginia.gov)
[6] § 63.2-1247. Disclosure to birth family; adoptive parents; medical, etc., information; exchange of information; open records in parental placement adoptions (virginia.gov)
[7] § 63.2-917. Fostering Futures program; established (virginia.gov)
[8] § 4.1-306. Purchasing alcoholic beverages for one to whom they may not be sold; penalty; forfeiture (virginia.gov)
[9] § 64.2-1600. Definitions (virginia.gov)
[10] Virginia Rules of Professional Conduct, Rules 1.8(f) and 5.4(c) clarify the ethical obligations owed to young adult clients, in the family context. Rules of Professional Conduct (vsb.org)
